Sunday, February 21, 2010

The Great Disappearing Act!

I am having a seriously difficult time finding a moment to write in this blog...how was it that, before Christmas, I had the time to write every day, and now I'm lucky to write once or twice a month? Well, having no prep at the high school definitely affects that, and my level of fatigue as well and thus my ability to sit down and type without falling asleep on my keyboard...
I've been enjoying the odd patriotic moment since the Olympics began in Vancouver, and even purchased myself some official Olympic mittens. It's been nice having something to cheer about, and I can't help but wish I could be involved in something like the Olympics that brings so many people from so many different walks of life together for one cause.
That's why I've always wanted to be part of Doctors Without Borders, as a doctor obviously because that had been, for many years, my life's aspiration. I just wanted to be part of something bigger than me, than being here. Hmm...maybe I can still be part of it, just in a different way. One day.
Now I have something new to add to my ridiculously busy and complicated life...and that is exercise. I suck at it, I don't like it (although I'll read all the research and enjoy the idea of it), I don't do it. But that's why I weigh 180 lbs and have a muffin-top band of blubber protruding from over all my pants, and why few of my pants fit me anymore. And now I have to face all my friends from university, most of whom I haven't seen since 2006, since before I gained the weight. More than anything, however, I just need to get healthier and strong.
So, I've started a fitness group with my friend Lisa, and I've agreed to exercise. Every two weeks, we'll get together to motivate each other, and to "submit" our exercise successes (and/or failures) and body measurements for ALL to see. The true test will be tomorrow, when I may just have to get up at 5am to exercise, because there just doesn't seem to be any other time available what with 7:30 starts at work every day, and making dinner, and homework....and of course that means going to bed at 8/9pm every night if I'm ever to survive the day, and that takes away all my writing time.
BUT! It will all be worth it if only I can make a positive change. I have lots of time to write come summer, and maybe next year my schedule will be such that I can fit exercise in at more appropriate (!) times of the day.
Wish me luck...nose to the grindstone starts tomorrow. Oh exercise gurus of the world, give me strength to persist and succeed!

Friday, February 12, 2010

Proud to be Canadian

Best Olympic Games opening ceremony ever....not only did it have a killer list of artists, it actually meant something. To know what all those lights and theatrics represented, to have touched those trees and bathed in those seas, to see the trees turn to colours so vibrant...even up north, far away from the crowds and commotion, I felt part of something bigger than me and this place and it was a wonderful moment to be Canadian. Everyone always asks what it means, what it is, to be a Canadian. What is our national dish? Our national this or that? And we always have such a hard time answering, because we're fishing for something so specific we can't see what's before our very eyes...we are no specific person or place or type of anything. We are all! I saw it tonight with our multicultural news crews, and with our athletes, with the sheer variety of entertainment and experience shown on that Olympic stage. And what a joy to be part of it, to be part of a nation that prides itself on being what everyone needs it to be.
To sum it up:


We Are More
by Shane Koyczan
When defining Canada
you might list some statistics
you might mention our tallest building
or biggest lake
you might shake a tree in the fall
and call a red leaf Canada
you might rattle off some celebrities
might mention Buffy Sainte-Marie
might even mention the fact that we've got a few
Barenaked Ladies
or that we made these crazy things
like zippers
electric cars
and washing machines
when defining Canada
it seems the world's anthem has been
" been there done that"
and maybe that's where we used to be at
it's true
we've done and we've been
we've seen
all the great themes get swallowed up by the machine
and turned into theme parks
but when defining Canada
don't forget to mention that we have set sparks
we are not just fishing stories
about the one that got away
we do more than sit around and say "eh?"
and yes
we are the home of the Rocket and the Great One
who inspired little number nines
and little number ninety-nines
but we're more than just hockey and fishing lines
off of the rocky coast of the Maritimes
and some say what defines us
is something as simple as please and thank you
and as for you're welcome
well we say that too
but we are more
than genteel or civilized
we are an idea in the process
of being realized
we are young
we are cultures strung together
then woven into a tapestry
and the design
is what makes us more
than the sum total of our history
we are an experiment going right for a change
with influences that range from a to zed
and yes we say zed instead of zee
we are the colours of Chinatown and the coffee of Little Italy
we dream so big that there are those
who would call our ambition an industry
because we are more than sticky maple syrup and clean snow
we do more than grow wheat and brew beer
we are vineyards of good year after good year
we reforest what we clear
because we believe in generations beyond our own
knowing now that so many of us
have grown past what used to be
we can stand here today
filled with all the hope people have
when they say things like "someday"
someday we'll be great
someday we'll be this
or that
someday we'll be at a point
when someday was yesterday
and all of our aspirations will pay the way
for those who on that day
look towards tomorrow
and still they say someday
we will reach the goals we set
and we will get interest on our inspiration
because we are more than a nation of whale watchers and lumberjacks
more than backpacks and hiking trails
we are hammers and nails building bridges
towards those who are willing to walk across
we are the lost-and-found for all those who might find themselves at a loss
we are not the see-through gloss or glamour
of those who clamour for the failings of others
we are fathers brothers sisters and mothers
uncles and nephews aunts and nieces
we are cousins
we are found missing puzzle pieces
we are families with room at the table for newcomers
we are more than summers and winters
more than on and off seasons
we are the reasons people have for wanting to stay
because we are more than what we say or do
we live to get past what we go through
and learn who we are
we are students
students who study the studiousness of studying
so we know what as well as why
we don't have all the answers
but we try
and the effort is what makes us more
we don't all know what it is in life we're looking for
so keep exploring
go far and wide
or go inside but go deep
go deep
as if James Cameron was filming a sequel to The Abyss
and suddenly there was this location scout
trying to figure some way out
to get inside you
because you've been through hell and high water
and you went deep
keep exploring
because we are more
than a laundry list of things to do and places to see
we are more than hills to ski
or countryside ponds to skate
we are the abandoned hesitation of all those who can't wait
we are first-rate greasy-spoon diners and healthy-living cafes
a country that is all the ways you choose to live
a land that can give you variety
because we are choices
we are millions upon millions of voices shouting
" keep exploring... we are more"
we are the surprise the world has in store for you
it's true
Canada is the "what" in "what's new?"
so don't say "been there done that"
unless you've sat on the sidewalk
while chalk artists draw still lifes
on the concrete of a kid in the street
beatboxing to Neil Young for fun
don't say you've been there done that
unless you've been here doing it
let this country be your first-aid kit
for all the times you get sick of the same old same old
let us be the story told to your friends
and when that story ends
leave chapters for the next time you'll come back
next time pack for all the things
you didn't pack for the first time
but don't let your luggage define your travels
each life unravels differently
and experiences are what make up
the colours of our tapestry
we are the true north
strong and free
and what's more
is that we didn't just say it
we made it be.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Urban Dictionary

Why I love urbandictionary.com
Jillian Defined:
"This is a complex name to understand let alone define. The reason this is so complicated is because the many theory's experts have come to. One of the theory's states that this name is only used for people with extreme power and or abilities like a goddess or pharaoh. The extent of this name cannot put into perspective for the simple fact that a word has not been created that fully describes her. Philosophers say Cleopatra was going to be named Jillian but once the power of the name alone was considered they decided she could not fulfill such large shoes.

Jillian is an incredible friend, who's loyal and wont stab you in the back. She has an amazing sense of humor and loves to laugh and have a good time. She may come up with some ideas that simple minded humans cannot see the point or concept, these ideas takes someone else who's name shares the same magnitude as hers. Because of this some may consider her and some of her ideas crazy, stop yourself from thinking this because this type of crazy is far past your imagination and should be thought of as a good thing. Shes a beautiful woman to say the least. Hot/sexy would also be another good term to address her appearance. Her intelligence is far beyond anything a simple mind can understand so don't even try to venture down that road. Simply put Jillian is awesome for lack of a better word.
Jillian. there is nothing that accurately describes her but this is as close as we can get."

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Going Crazy!

 
Well, I think my photo today represents just about everything I need to say this lovely and far too short evening at home... Truthfully, there's no particular reason or person to whom this cartoon is directed. I am only implying that I think I will either die, or go crazy, before this semester is through! I have never been so entirely swamped....not having a prep combined with this particularly time-absorbing semester of classes to teach has left me feeling on the edge of anxiety at every moment! Oh dear...only half way through the second week. How much further till summer vacation??

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Where Did the Time Go...and Stew!

Here we are, 5:30 on a Sunday evening, and I'm only just taking a moment to relax. This entire weekend has been nothing but work! My goodness...I feel better, knowing what on earth I'll be teaching in each class this week, but it has been a while since I've had to immerse myself in such intense planning, and most of it is because I'm completely designing courses from scratch. It would be nice to just copy someone's binder, but in this case I know no one whose binder I can copy, so I spend hours and hours researching (mostly with the art and drama classes) and only then can I actually make day-to-day plans for my students. Phew...I'm pooped.
I'm looking forward to spending my evening immersed in "just for me" activities...
I finally went to the art store downtown and used my (birthday!) gift certificate from Nicholas, and with that purchased a lovely set of Staedler pencil crayons, along with some good art "helpers" like kneadable erasers and paper stump smudgers. I'm looking forward to improving my art, with the hopes that ONE DAY I'll finish my book, and have the skill to illustrate it. We'll see...
Valentine's day is slowly approaching, and I'm going to make a lovely day of it with a chocolate torte. I think...haven't quite decided yet. I love the idea of making Valentine's Day a family affair, with a nice breakfast and dinner, table decorations, just a big love fest. Nicholas and I never really do anything, ourselves, like spend extravagant amounts of money on dinner and wine at an upscale restaurant (although just once it'd be lovely). The whole commercial aspect of Valentine's is, like every holiday, way over done. Spending it at home, with a home-cooked meal and time together with the people we love is how it's done!
Speaking of home-cooked meals, time to stir my stew. Beef stew with dumplings - now there's a winter meal!

Thursday, February 4, 2010

The Joy of Art

I am enjoying my new groups of students this semester, if only for the fact that I have a stolen moment here and there to draw! I am busier than I have ever been, flying around the school to three different classrooms, one of which is filled with 33 students (and a Drama class at that...33 actors!). My room is an absolute mess, with piles of miscellaneous papers everywhere on my desk and smears of paint and glaze on the tables,  I'm planning each lesson on the whim (valid material though!), but I actually have time to talk with the kids, to circulate, and discuss art, and get to know each other, and actually enjoy what I am doing here and there instead of just babysitting. THAT is lovely.
And nicest of all, I get to draw. It is hard teaching art and never having time to art for oneself. I, personally, tend to doubt that I have any artistic sensibilities at all, until I have a moment to pick up a pencil and remind myself, hey! you're an artist! Always nice to remember. I am quite happy with this eye I drew....Not perfect, I know, but I like it. I didn't realize I could even do such a thing - I don't generally draw in pencil but paint instead after a quick sketch! But, I'm developing my skills. I do, after all, only have Art 9 under my belt as an art course I took.
As for another art form, I'm thinking it is time to sit down with a nice hot cup of tea and plug away at my story. I enjoyed my drawing, and sometimes I think I'd love to illustrate my own book. Wish I could take an art course! But now it's time to make a story, or there will be no scenes to draw. Hmmm...where did I leave off?

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Hurrah! Or not...


One side of me wants to be positive and completely not pay attention to all the rumours and less-than-rumours that are circulating through the workplace (all of which have to do with the cuts coming this year to education in this community). I just want to ignore it, really, and think about it later when there's actually something solid to work with. We've now heard that there will be 100 surplus teachers in the district. Who knows how many there actually will be, but I'm sure there will be a few and both Nicholas and I are at great risk of being on that list with our low seniority. Really, anyone lower than 5 years in experience is at risk. So, we're just taking it day by day. We won't know anything definitive until, oh, about May? THEN I'll worry about being surplus. Then again, maybe I won't even then. After all, it's not like I'm rooted here; we can easily go overseas, and will make sure to apply everywhere we possibly can so that we have positions and income next year.
I suppose what bugs me is, now people are rallying. People get alllll worked up over things, when they don't even have all the information. And, if people are rallying, that can lead to more rallying, and then of course the big question comes....strike, or no strike?
Which is horrible! I know it's my right to take a stand. But...on one hand, I lose my job and have no income. On the other hand, I leave my job even earlier and have no income even sooner. Hmmm....what's better?
Just another reason I wish I could get out of this system. It is so unfriendly! I was laid off in Vancouver. I move north to where it's "safe" - few people want to move up north after university and growing up in the south...of course there are jobs! Which there were, at the time. Lose the job in Mackenzie, move to Prince George (not a lay off, but close enough), and then now we're dealing with it here. I can't take much more pushing and shoving around. Had I known...
And indeed, had anyone known, would we have teachers? It's supposed to be the most stable profession, but it seems the least!
Do university students, in their eager beaver bubbles, realize all of this? If so, would they bother? I wonder.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Say ahhhh!

I am frozen right now, from my chin to my eyeball...I've had a sensitive tooth now for over a year, and have seen a dentist (different each time) to try to figure out why this is so. The first two, one I trust and one I don't so much, could find nothing wrong. The third finally found a cavity, which today has been fixed, thank goodness. 4 needles full of freezing plus the topical freezing...and I'm done for! Nothing like having the dentist start drilling, and despite all the freezing you can still feel it! I'm dribbling tea all down my front....can't wait till dinner.