Flu Shots and Other Freakishness

I've been stabbed in both arms all at once, but at least now I don't have to dread getting the flu. Nicholas and I just happened to walk by our local flu shot clinic - surprisingly a whole floor of a building dedicated to it - and just walked in on a whim and had our shots done, no waiting necessary. I wasn't sure how I felt about getting both the regular shot and the H1N1 shot, but considering my specialist recommended it I thought it wise. Nicholas had to get them as well, by association. My arms do hurt! Sore muscles. Didn't feel the H1N1 hardly at all...it's the regular flu shot that's the doozy.
I'm hoping not to get any of the post-shot flu symptoms like some of my friends have had...ick. We'll see!
No time today for writing, but I'm ok with that for now. I made my 50,000 words to win NaNoWriMo, and  have lots of work to do still but right now I'm just basking in the glory of having accomplished this month's writing goal!
And right on time...because Christmas concert season fast approaches. Not only am I teaching full-time, and part-time at the conservatory, I'm also accompanying several vocalists at two concerts, and singing "Rejoice Greatly" from Handel's Messiah for the Cantata Singer's Sing-Along Messiah. Busy! I'll still fit some writing in there, lots hopefully, but soon it will be Christmas vacation and I can write without rushing or worrying about other work!
But first, Christmas baking. I'll start this weekend, after we put up the tree. So far, we'll be having: butter tarts, shortbread, peanut brittle, Christmas pudding (cake), gingerbread, mini meat pies...in addition to turkey dinner! Now that all my grandmothers are gone, I feel the need to carry on the tradition of home baking for the holidays, to pass on to my kids when the time comes. But for Christmas morning, I'm definitely buying the croissants!
6am wake-up tomorrow in the icy cold...bed time now, or I'll never wake up in the morning! What ever happened to my morningness? I used to be a morning person. Now I'm a zombie. ***sigh.

I'm a NaNoWriMo Winner!

Yup, that's right. I won NaNoWriMo! I beat the clock, the doubt, the self-deprecating mind play, and finally got my novel over the 50,000 word mark! I officially have 54,903 words to my book, an odd assortment of random scenes but also some good, fluent narrative in spots as well.
This by no means will be the end of it...I have so much work still to do! Like, for instance, finish the silly thing. But that can't be the end of the narrative...there's just so much I want Nola to accomplish! Then it will be on to Book Two, and Book Three, and...No Jillian, stay focussed on Book One. I'm just so glad to be at a point where what I've written is actually novel size. I'm really getting somewhere.
Spent today making my advent wreath...found some noble fir boughs and it looks lovely. Most importantly, however, it reminds me of the reason for all that we do this month, from concerts to gift-giving to baking like crazy for a special family get-together. Sometimes the commercial hubbub takes away from it all...I loved my time living in Germany. It was so...wholesome. Here, you can't even get through Halloween before the Christmas decorations start coming out in stores. Isn't there something wrong with that?
I'm dreading the start of the workweek...a few days away from school and I start to feel like myself again, instead of the stiff-necked humbug I must be in order to hold any kind of authority over my  students...some of whom have lately taken to telling me how to teach and that they don't have to do assignments they don't feel are "valid."
Ah yes...back to work.
But first? A good ol' Hallmark movie for a few more hours of fuzzy, all-warm-inside goodness.

Novel Word Count: 54,903

Christmas Begins!

The stockings are hung...on the wall, because I have no fireplace, which is entirely and completely tragic at this time of year. Watching it on the tv is nice, but just not the same. For one, no lovely wood smell. Second, my crappy tv goes from loud to mute with very little in between...so instead of providing atmosphere it sounds like I'm being shot at every time the tv fire sparks and hits a pocket of air or sap.
We decorated the house today, although we're still not finished. That's mostly due to the wiring in this crazy place...gotta wonder why people make the choices they do when building houses. **ahem: money!
We have light sockets in bizarre, unconventional places, and some that don't work at all, so this will be a challenge in cord confusion (I mean, organization). But it all looks lovely! Soon, next weekend, we'll go and loot the hydro lines for a lovely Charlie Brown Christmas tree, which I'm entirely allowed to do because I downloaded a permit from the BC Forestry website. Yes, yes, I could go to a tree farm and do a u-cut, maybe go for a sleigh ride...Or I could drive out to the boonies and hack my way through feet of snow and snarled branches for the gimpiest tree ever, but appreciate it all the more!
It will truly be Christmas when the tree is up. In the meantime, I'm falling in love again with Bach's Christmas Oratorios and all my favourite Christmas oldies and Baroque/Classical masterpieces.
The Bailey Monster seems to like it too...I just hope she doesn't like it all enough to eat it. Last year she devoured some of our special tree decorations from Egypt (yes, from Egypt), just as she devoured our stuffed camel figurines the year before. What's with her and going for all the irreplaceble stuff? Oh, that, and puzzle pieces. Both puzzles I've purchased these last two years had to be thrown out, because she snuffles up anything she finds on the floor. Note to self: purchase felt puzzle pad.
The book is going great! I'm getting lots of writing done. In fact, I just might make it to 50,000 before the deadline! Not that I'll win any big awards, but I'll sure feel great.
Now, I think to cap off this fine snowy evening, I'll put on my first seasonal movie and snuggle with my pooch. Maybe start a puzzle...while she's not looking.

NaNoWriMo Countdown - 3 days!

It's cold outside, there's a fresh coating of snow, and tonight we unpacked our Christmas boxes while putting on our first Christmas CD of the season - King's College Choir's "Noel" (classic!). A lovely Friday evening...
On the more panicked side, there's only 3 days until the end of NaNoWriMo! My blog challenge will continue, but my mad race to 50,000 will be over, although perhaps I'll just pretend it's on all year so I keep spewing out words!
I don't know if I'll make 50,000...I had this brilliant idea that, if I were to type up 5,000 per day from yesterday to Monday, I could do it. But, I only did about 3,000 today, maybe 1,000 yesterday. So...slim chance. BUT, I have 33,000 words! I'm so excited! And, most of it's pretty organized. I just can't wait till I type the last word and say, there's no more to add!
Then comes the really hard work - redrafts and editing. Hmm...tackle that battle when I reach it. My novel is slow to write now because I'm trying to avoid massive rewriting, by have the narrative work NOW.
The burn on my wrist is ok today, still slathering it with Polysporin and wrapping it up to keep it clean, but it's not causing me any issues other than the fact that it the bandage seems to have a homing device for my dog's tongue (what is it with her and licking things ? You should see her with hand cream!).
Here's keeping the fingers crossed for massive word count tomorrow, and more snow, and more holiday cheer!

Hazards of Winter

My school district has this policy...that until the snow reaches the level of 6 inches in the parking lot, they will not plow it. Apparently, for them to contract out the plowing for one day, it costs upwards of $40,000.
I didn't care last week when I heard this, and I didn't care today when I felt its repercussions!
As I was getting out of my car, trying very carefully to remove the pottery in there that I had brought home to finish, and was bringing back today to fire in the kiln...well, I slipped. But, I also had in my arms a thermos cup of tea. The morning started out wrong in the first place, because I left my usual mug last night at the conservatory. It was air tight. Today's was not. I slipped on the ice, and in an effort to not drop my books and papers and pottery(effort failed), I poured scalding hot tea directly on my left wrist, which then had heat trapped in by my sleeve because my hands were too full to pull it up.
Result?
SECOND DEGREE BURNS and a nice chunk of first degree as well. Seriously. No exaggeration.
So, because my school district chose to not plow our school parking lot, I now have a bandaged risk and eventually, a nice scar to remember it all by (and lots of WCB paperwork).
Thanks district for sanding the ice, early this morning, but guess what? You missed a spot.
Arg.

Exhaustion!

I'm so tired today, I nearly fell asleep at 5:30 pm before I had to rush off to teach at the conservatory. How am I ever to get much done in the evening when I can't even stay awake? Probably still the remnants of the Monday night late show...I can barely keep my eyes open, so this will be short.
"Winning has been activated" is now the slogan on the NaNoWriMo site. I won't be getting there myself, but can you believe over 1 billion words have been written so far this month by contestants? To be precise: 1,776,482,205!!!
I'm not doing so horribly though. I'm now up to just over 29,000 words. No 50K, but it feels great.
My dog, Bailey, is telling me it's time to go to bed, by placing her chin on my keyboard so that I can type. I second the opinion - my eyes are drooping. I'm do tired...I nearly scrambled my original document, so I could load it in code onto the NaNoWriMo site for word count. Eek!
Till tomorrow.

This Story is Actually Going Somewhere!

I just can't wait to get there! I have all these ideas for my novel, plot sequences and exciting happenings that I just can't wait to have happen to my main character, but of course my fingers, and my brain, as so slow. It's not that the in between parts are bad, but I just can't help but anticipate these events which will really change Nola's life forever. Like, right now, she still doesn't know about her magic...or heritage. I'm so excited to reveal it to her, to have something happen to her and see how she reacts to it. Will she be freaked out? Excited? Well, I already have my answer...I know exactly how it will make her feel, considering the climate in France and all over Europe really during the 18th century and before regarding "magic."
Sometimes it feels as if I'm just plodding along, filling space until I can get to those momentous occasions, but then I remember its going to be those middle parts that really make the book, that make it something people will devour and enjoy word by word instead of just put down because it's too slow to develop or not engaging enough to bother continuing.
I have reached 28,000 words now...it's not fully in sequence but it's 28,000 usable words that really add to the story at different times in her life. I just have to string them all together. I figure, if I write 2,000 words per day, plus at least triple that each day this weekend, I could actually get to 50,000 words by the NaNoWriMo deadline (Nov. 30th)!
No problem, right? Ha! Tall order. But most importantly, I'm actually getting somewhere with this story. Can't wait to see where I take it tomorrow night.
I nearly fell asleep over my laptop tonight, mid-thought and mid-sentence! 1 am bedtime last night (morning!) is definitely not conducive to good writing sessions...thankfully, my mom called and woke me up. Thanks Mom! Managed to get a few more words out.
Till tomorrow.

New Moon, Photographic Memory, and Popcorn

Well, there you have it. New Moon. Went out tonight with a friend to see the second movie in the epic Twilight series. And it was VERY entertaining!
Lots of criticism from many sources....but I feel exactly as I do about the books. No Nobel prizes for literature, no Academy Awards for the movie. But did they tell a great story? Yes.
I must look back to the author (Stephenie Meyer) and her amazing story. Look at what one person can do, with perseverence and a little talent! Yes, inspiring.
I hope my book can have an ounce of her book's success...I don't need movies and an entire franchise, I just need to get it done and published. Funny enough, however, I see the entire story like a movie in my head. Didn't find out till I was in my 6th year of university that I have a photographic memory (so that's why I can remember to many phone numbers and passwords!), and I see everything from the characters to the scenes in panoramic technicolour. I even know what music I'd use for the scenes (epic battle in second book between Nola and her love Gabriel with her father = Beethoven Symphony No. 2 Opus 97: Allegretto, for your information).
I didn't write tonight, still stuck at 19,000, but I count tonight's activities worthy research and helpful as a boost of inspiration. And...it's always good to relax and eat a little popcorn.

One More Week of NaNoWriMo!

Sometimes dreams offer me inspiration. Interestingly, and at times irritatingly, I remember most of my dreams. I'll wake up in the morning, and have complete story lines, and character sketches, to share with my husband. Sometimes they're very good dreams, ones I could turn into stories. I still remember the recurring dream from my childhood, where I'm standing on this great precipice, and the sky is black, and the rock around this crater-like precipice is red like pumice stone, and I'm being chased in by none other than that huge shiny demon thing (with the bull horns) from the movie Legend. Yes, my form of a nightmare. I wouldn't use that in a book...I can't even watch horror films or thrillers, as if I could write them.
Then I have these dreams which fit in to "The Greater Plan" as I call it, this intricate arrangement of events and circumstances that could only be coordinated by a supreme being: God. Like having dreams about my grandparents who've passed on.
This summer I lost both of my Hudson grandparents, and two of the people I was closest with, my entire life, in the entire world. I had this crazy dream...I was in what I assume was like a senior's home, and they were playing a game. And I remember seeing Grandma, and it was so wonderful! She was all better, no more dimensia from strokes, just totally lucid, herself, with that great chuckle I can still hear (and remind myself to remember, like the smell of her perfume or her smile)...she even came over for dinner to Mom and Dad's with Grandpa, like old times. Then we ended up playing games at that place (strange how dreams can toggle between locations - they totally defy the space-time continuum!). And then it was a vote or competition, for her and Grandpa to be the "heads" but Grandpa wasn't there so I stepped in...and then I had to remind Grandma not to eat crayons, and then they were gone again.
Huh...
I wasn't ready to let go of them yet, especially BOTH. Grandma was expected...but Grandpa dying a day after her? Not expected. It's like the dream was a boosters shot, just a little more of them, EXACTLY how they always were, to slow down the withdrawal.
Then you get dreams that are totally useless, like last night's dream. Very "Notebook," girl falls in love with guy her family thinks she's way too good for, and even though she commits to the "other" (rich, stable, valiant and utterly boring) guy she runs back to the one she really loves...in this dream he was a dentist, and she ran into his office, and there was this great big romantic kissing scene complete with Liberace on piano, and then I was kissing him (another oddity: point of view change within the same dream...only a second before I was observing only), but his mouth was full of toothpaste, and then mine was too, and it was dribbling down my chin and all over my shirt but I didn't care because I was in love! Don't think I'll use that one as a book idea...
I'm realizing now that there is only one more week until the end of NaNoWriMo...and I totally don't care that I haven't reached the 34,000 word sign-post for today...
If you think about it, I started NaNoWriMo 7 days late...granted, I already had a lot of my story sussed out, and have been working on the background information/reasons for/major events now for 2 years. Still, I didn't start drilling myself into such constant output until the 7th of November. Today is the 22nd. Any way you look at it, I have written 19,000 words in 15 days. That's 19,000 decently organized, well thought out, fluent words. That's pretty awesome! Now, if I just pretend NaNoWriMo is still operating after the 30th, maybe I'll finish this book in the New Year! And, of course, books 2 and 3 are already planned, so it only goes up from here!
I'm also quite proud of my blog's new look...do you know how long it took me to use html (that's right - computer science talk!) to create that interactive menu on the left? Yes, I did that on my own, with the help from a few other blogs who explained it for me. I figured out colour codes on my own though so it wasn't a garish yellow, which it started out as. Cool! Previous to this, the only html experience I had was when I snuck into a friend's computer science class in university to takes notes while she was at the doctor's. Didn't understand a word, but I took many devoted notes.
My husband is sawing logs beside me...I envy his ability to crash so quickly. I'm the opposite...borderline insomniac. Busy day tomorrow: 7:30am start at work, accompanying 6 voice students (on piano) at 4pm for the Festival of Trees, and maybe even catching a late show viewing of New Moon with a friend. I NO it's time to log off Know, because EYE keep typing in the wrong version, or homonym, of the word EYE'm looking FOUR. He he...
Out goes the light.

Work, Not Play!

I'm sitting at Starbucks...not for the coffee (although I couldn't resist a triple-grande soy latte!), but for the atmosphere. Billie Holiday and Vince Gueraldi sounding from the speakers, the whirring of coffee grinders and steamy "chhhhh" spitting from the milk frother...perfect amount of background noise and warm colours to make for fruitful writing session.

I thought I'd try something different today...as much as I love sitting with my dog snoring logs beside me on the couch, I've developed successive kinks in both sides of my neck over the last two weeks and thought, for the sake of a fully mobile neck, I'd better find a table somewhere to set myself up. As the dining room table offered no inspiration whatsoever, and distracted me to the nines with all the clutter, I got in the car and drove to the one other place in town that makes me feel all gushy and warm and cozy - Starbucks. I am the first to admit, their coffee is not great. It comes across as rather generic, like everything is diluted in flavour to appeal to a mass of uncultured coffee tastes, and then filled with sugar. Thus my need for three shots of espresso. But in atmosphere, it wins the golden star. When I'm writing, atmosphere is key. 

My coffee is nearly finished, and I know at some point I'll have to migrate home and put some dinner on the stove. Spaghetti maybe. Or maybe I'll be really lucky and it will be made for me! 

I find this whole writing thing difficult....mostly because no one truly understands the amount of emotional, physical, and psychological work it involves. It is my THIRD career...I teach high school, music at the conservatory, and I write. How many hours a week is that? But it doesn't have a set amount of hours of prescribed times those hours must be logged. Nor does it pay, up front at least. Perhaps to some, then, it seems more like a hobby. But it is far from this! I am not playing, I am WORKING. If only everyone saw it that way.

And, if only it didn't make me so incredibly aloof! All I think about is writing, when I'll write, what I'll write, what my characters will choose to do today, how much I'll get through in a day...I'm going CRAZY! Fine with me...except it tends to eclipse everything else. 

Now, it must eclipse my blog as well! I have an hour until I've been out of the house for an unreasonable amount of time. Time to get writing!

Ambrosia on a bun?

Fatburger. That's the last place I'd want to go for supper. Who'd want a fat burger? We all know they're fatty. Do we really need to be reminded in the title of the restaurant? at least if I go to McD's I can pretend it's good for me...no reminders except my tastebuds that it's crap. But Fatburger? Just walking in there says that I know it's bad for me, but abuse my body anyways for the sake of a quick tasty bite. It sounds all grease, and globby beef fat...So we put it to the test tonight. And, in fact, it beats McDonald's and A&W way out of the water, health-wise! Not that it is healthy, but they make the burgers there from "scratch", no microwaves or warming trays, everything fresh each day and not frozen...real ice cream milkshakes, lemonade...very nice. So, pleasantly surprised.
Still, I have to stop eating junk food. Not that we do it often...but I'm paying for it now with an upset stomach. The things we do to ourselves...
BOOKWISE, lots of ideas coming from random places. And I'm not sure...should I be updating everyone on plot events online, or does that give it away? Or worse, could someone steal it? That's why I haven't written much yet on the actual book, other than my feelings upon writing it. Ultimately, I want my blog to function as a way to tell Nola's story, this thing I've created, and when Nola gets in a jam, I'd love people to get involved and help her solve. Once you start writing your characters take on this whole life, and even seem to start making their own decisions! It's crazy.
Anyways, here's to tomorrow and getting some crazy amounts of writing done. Won't reach 50,000 by the 30th, but hey! Look at what I've done so far.

Novel Word Count: 16,794

This is a post for posts sake, as I'm trying to commit to one post every day! Too busy today getting chewed out by irrational parents to write, people who can't seem to understand that their child's behaviour, and how it can affect their success, is the most important thing, and not whether or not they get on the honour roll. Good! They didn't make it! Maybe now they'll know life isn't a free ticket, and that disrespect, rudeness, and laziness won't get them very far. School of hard knocks, buddy! Bitter much? Oh yes...I just don't think I should have to go to work on an evening and be made to feel like crap because someone's child clowned around and got a "Needs Improvement" for behaviour. Is that too much to ask?

This generation of kids really does scare me (although some of them have scary parents too)...I realized on Remembrance Day that most of these kids have no relationship to veterans from WWI/WWII. I had a close relationship with my grandfathers, who shared stories with me of their experiences, and through them I am connected, and feel an obligation to uphold values that give me the life I live, and gratitude to them for giving me the life I live. For goodness' sake, I choke up at community Remembrance Day services, like this year, when I got all teary eyed as the mounties, and firefighters, and veterans, and all other uniformed people walked by in parade after the ceremony. These kids don't have this...their troubles are closer to home, many of them. Divorcing parents, crazy parents, no parents, parents themselves...but they also don't think beyond their own troubles. Many are too busy laughing at the students who are in cadets, and act as colour guards for the school ceremony, to even understand what they represent. This scares me.

Didn't get much writing done...I'd probably knock a character off or make a relationship go sour if I tried because I'm just annoyed! I don't think I should be responsible for anyone's life, even my character's (they're people in my head!), when I'm so fatalistic.

On a light note, tomorrow's Friday, and that means the beginning of the weekend, and that means I get to WRITE. Here's hoping I come up with lots of ideas!

Novel Word Count: approx 17,000 (I'm too tired to count)

I'm tired. 2 new voice students today, two vocal coaching sessions, a plumber, report cards, and now parent teacher interviews coming up tomorrow evening. When am I supposed to write? To make myself feel better, I fused my previous writings (flashbacks from my first story attempt) with my new attempt, although I have not created the transitions into those scenes yet. But, my word count is much higher now, so it was worth it if only so that I am not totally depressed after days like this when I'm too busy to even sit down on my couch, let alone write. My bed never looked so good! Oy veh, up at 6am...

Novel Word Count: 16,974

Snowy Slush and Late Night Mush!

There is a winter wonderland of slush outside, and my desire to merrily sing Christmas tunes has been sated. There's just no rejoicing to be had when you're sloshing around in scummy looking wet snow! But it started out rather majestically...come January, when the deep freeze sets in and sticks the snow to every living and inanimate object, I'll probably wish for the changeable nature of slush! Till then, bring on the sunshine. And sleep...can't wait to curl up in my flannel sheets tonight because, (what else is new?) I'm pooped.
More success writing tonight. It appears I need a good 2-3 hour window to be really productive. By the time I finish searching for that word that's on the tip of my tongue but just won't come out, or research whether or not 18th century France had ice boxes, it takes 3 hours to get a good chunk of writing done. It frustrates me that I can't have that much time each night of the week! And, when I do, by 10:00 Bailey is staring at me to rub her, and let her out to pee and then put her to bed. Yes: I communicate with my dog. In fact, I know all the different tones of her barks like a mother does her babies cries! Right now she's guilt tripping me with the biggest sighs I've ever heard emitted from an animal. They can be roughly interpreted as: "I don't understand why daddy is in bed sleeping, and I'm not!"
I feel like I've made some really great progress on the story. My characters are developing on paper (they're already developed in my head), and they're actually getting places geographically and emotionally...the story is slowly unfolding! Nola's 6-year old self is firmly esconced in France, elements of her character being revealed through her actions (like galloping a pony through a field to her mother's chagrin)...it's a whole new story. To explain further, I started this whole idea on a completely different bent, at a later date than 1782. It was so EXCITING and I loved it...but it needed more background. Then, adding the background with flashbacks made it too choppy and felt the pace of the narrative was lost. So all those flashbacks and now an entirely new book on their own, a prequel in a sense to the original story, now book 1 in what will inevitably (because, as you can see, I'm wordy) become a multivolume saga!
Amazing how you start with one thing, and it ends up completely different in such surprisingly pleasing ways!
I just kick Bailey off the couch before she falls asleep again...when she gets to that stage I must physically drag her off while she gives me the evil eye (ha, should have put me to bed sooner, mum!). She'll hang 3/4 off the couch before finally relenting to drop a foot to the floor.
I'm hoping to pull some passages soon (all those flashbacks) from my first manuscript into this new one, the first attempt sitting at about 30,000 words right now, and that will hopefully boost up my word count drastically. I'll never make it to 50,000 by the 30th in order to (try to) win this NaNoWriMo competition, but I'll keep trying! No matter what, progress is progress, and if I continue this pace past the 30th, I'm guaranteed to finish the book sooner (and get published?!!!!!!) than if I had never bothered to enter the contest at all. Amazing what a little competition will do.

Novel Word Count: (drum roll....) 11,098!

Moose...the New Reindeer

We woke up today to a blanket of freshly fallen snow, and three moose meandering through our front yard. How odd! I expect to see squirrels, birds, maybe the odd deer. My uncle used to feed racoons dog kibble in his yard, by the hand. But a moose is an entirely different creature. First, they're huge. Theirs heads are just so...huge. They can total a car in a crash without totalling themselves - that's how huge. I am glad to not have to suffer the long 2-hour drive home to Mackenzie from Prince George on such snowy days, which I've done many a time in the last year. I was always fearful of encountering moose...but luckily, they stayed to the side of the road.
Managed to write a wee little bit tonight, but in all honesty my bed seems more of a priority right now. I seriously doubt I will meet the 50,000 word deadline by November 30th, but I didn't enter this competition to do that - I just wanted some motivation to write, and that's exactly what I got. Not much improvement on yesterday, but it's progress all the same.

Novel Word Count: 9,900

Snowy Days and Sundays = Writer's Best Friend

Finally, success! The snow began to fall this morning, and a feeling of luxurious timeless descended on our house. There's is nothing like being at home, knowing you don't need to be anywhere else, to do anything but what you love, while you watch the snowflakes fall from the sky and alight on the ground.
I spent three hours of my day in the kitchen covered in flour...up to my elbows in pastry and yummy meat filling for homemade meat pies. According to my mother, I have inherited my grandmother's knack for pastry, and it just so happens my husband is a pastry lover. I cracked out my Australia Women's Weekly meat pie recipe, and off I went! A delicious treat well worth the elbow grease.
I also (and I must say, most importantly!) managed to sit for huge amounts of time and write away. I feel great knowing I've accomplished some writing today, and have boosted my wordcount up 2,000 words from yesterday! THAT is what I love about Sundays, and snowy days. I can start my week on good footing, reading to dive in Monday night from where I left off today. This is good - very very good! I can go to bed content, frustrated only that the weekend has come to end, but happy that it was fruitful.

Novel Word count: 9,786! 

Taking a Break

Sometimes, the best way to accomplish your goal is to stop trying altogether, for a day, a week...however long you need. Sometimes it's good to take a mental break, give your brain time to rest and refresh so that, when you're ready to get back to it, you get back to it with productive fervour! This is exactly what I am doing now...I'm frustrated when I can't write. I see the mountain of work clearly ahead of me, and it is a very tall mountain! It is a task I do with glee, climbing this mountain of words and decisions, but it is still daunting and sometimes I can't believe what I'm getting myself into, especially when I can't find time to write despite all my efforts. And worse, sometimes I just can't get into the right mental zone to make writing sessions worthwhile. A pattern is emerging.
It seems, more than ever,  I: a) don't have time to write, or b) don't have the energy to write. Teaching, report cards, shopping, cooking...even if I have time at the end of the day to sit down and get a good chunk of writing done, I am too tired. It takes a lot of energy to write, I find...and when I try in the midst of exhaustion, it comes out like a bunch of gobbledygook!
So I wonder, how on earth am I ever going to finish this book, and how much do I sacrifice in order to make it happen? Already, the evenings seem to grow longer as I try to squeeze more in each night. Then, do I go with quick dinners so I can get to writing sooner? Or rush dinner?
So, I decided tonight, even though I haven't written much for three days, to just take some time, sit with my husband, and get absorbed in LOST. This was good. I feel frustrated that I'm not writing, but I can't just abandon everything to make it happen! Life must go on, and it's very hard just to watch one episode of LOST when you have a whole season at your fingertips...addicting!
I'll try to get back on track tomorrow with my novel. In the meantime, at least I've written this. One of my goals is to write at least a bit each day. Just a few well-formed sentences put together in some sort of comprehensible order. And when I go back to the novel, I think I'll do better after having a mental day. Well, seems more like a mental week. Or perhaps I'm just mental, period.
Oh well. Time for bed.

Novel Word Count: abysmal.

A Whole Lotta Nothing

Another day with nothing to show for it, novel wise...why can't I just stop everything and write? Oh yes, I must make a living, or I'll be writing with a degenerate laptop on a stoop. Not so desirable...
I'm looking forward to tomorrow. First, my first craft fair of the season! It feels so much more like that special time of year after a stroll through a school gym brimming with crafts and the scent of hot apple cider!
Second, I didn't bring an ounce of work home from school which means the majority of my time will be spent writing. And, I'm inspired! Telling people I'm writing a novel sounds so pretentious...like I'm bragging, or trying to feel self-important. Sometimes the reception is one of confusion...how does one explain a two-year thought process in a sentence? I share my ideas with a variety of people, some with an attention span no larger than my dog's when there are no cookies in my pockets, so usually I don't bother getting into much detail and I leave the conversation feeling rather disheartened. Today, however, I explained my idea to someone who actually cared to listen, and was enthralled, and actually wanted to buy it if ever it came to print! He hasn't read my writing, so I'll give him a chance to skim it first without holding him to it...but it's nice to feel like what I love, what I'm spending SO much time on (what I'm driving my husband nuts over) actually excites someone else as it excites me!
Time for bed...in my effort to keep this blog going every day (a personal challenge to myself to ensure that everyday, I'm writing SOMETHING), my bed time seems to get later each night. Nicholas is usually asleep when I get to bed, which I hate. I'm usually the first in bed, and bed time is lonely when the person you say goodnight to is snoring. Half the day, I'm a total space cadet, thinking of my story and far off somewhere else. So many small sacrifices add up, but the hope is that eventually, sooner rather than later I hope, they will pay off. Sorry love for taking mental vacations and not being there when you fall asleep - but I'm sure you know I'm doing this as much for you as for myself.
I never thought about the life of a writer until I began doing it myself. How on earth do they do it?

Novel Word Count: a dismal 7824 (apparently I'm supposed to be at 25,000 today...eek!)

Ain't Nothin' Better Than...

Cookies and milk! And I don't mean just any cookie...I mean Oreos. Yes, after a long night of marking and  staring at a computer screen to complete report cards for 120 students, Oreos and milk are just about the best thing in the world. This, coming from someone who is lactose sensitive! Of course, nothing these days is ever guilt free...
I am perfectly aware that my milk - non-organic because I simply can't afford to supply my husband with the good stuff at the incredible rate he drinks it - is full of ghastly hormones which could fatten me up into a little heifer...and my beloved Oreos have enough sugar and fat in them to completely reset (backwards) my entire endocrine system. Yes, I am aware of this. And yet I eat and drink merrily! It's amazing what we put into our bodies while being fully aware it is toxic!
I have nothing to say about my novel, except that I am EXCEEDINGLY frustrated that I couldn't get to it today. A frustration about not being able to devote my time solely to this endeavour...but now that report cards are finished I have the entire weekend to get my word count back up!

Novel Word Count (sadly): 7,662

Confessions of an Inquisitive Child...

Each author has an ish...mine is description. I delight in finding the perfect words to describe a situation, taste, smell, sight, or feel...but sometimes such descriptions require confessions of a rather embarrassing nature, that elicit less than favourable responses in others.
For instance, my first host father in Germany was an epicurean sort, who love good cheese and wine and lavished his rotund figure with it on a regular basis. He often travelled around Europe collecting delights, such as mounds (and I do mean mounds) of Swiss chocolate for me to try (one of every bar, some enormous...which I proceeded to polish off within a week) and Petit Ecolier cookies from France. Most memorable of course, was his trip to Paris, from which he brought back the best of aged brie and camembert. I thought this wonderful...until I tasted it. All I could say, is that it tasted like dirty gym socks. Most took this to mean I had, at some point, sample dirty gym socks and found the flavour comparable to that of camembert. What I meant to say is, it takes like what I IMAGINE dirty gym socks to taste like...you get my point. Word choice is everything!
Tonight, I attempted to describe the unexpected, bitter flavour of Seville marmalade to a 6-year-old during the 18th century, who is from a place where even just a plain orange would be hard to come by. And, for some reason, ear wax came to mind. I have had this thought before...when I was 11 I had open heart surgery, but was terrified of being put under with a needle, and didn't want gas either. I had (and still do) a particular hatred for black licorice because it tasted like the flavour left in my mouth from sleeping gas, when I'd had tubes put in my ears several years before. So, I opted for a liquid anaesthetic. All I can say is, it tasted like earwax.
Now, don't give me that look! Everyone always cringes when I say this, and I know what you're thinking. Do you eat earwax often? But I know you know what I mean. Surely, most of us have, at some point, had a little tickle in our ears, and dared to plunge a digit inside to expunge the itch. Then, without thinking, you later put your finger in your mouth, to floss your teeth, or pick out a popcorn kernel, or likc your fingers because you (very naughtily) ate some crap-packed orange cheesies and they're just finger licking good. And you get this horrible taste in your mouth, bitter, and realize it's ear wax.
Surely, I'm not the only one who has done this? Goodness, someone's even written a book about it!
Well, there you go. I confess: I have tasted earwax. But I know I'm not the only one.
What other strange confessions will my attempts at description elicit?

Novel Word Count To Date: 7,662

Thick as Molasses...

I feel like a fly who has made the mistake of landing in a drop of molasses...the more I flail the more thoroughly I become stuck in the stickiness. As hard as I try to spew out words for fluency's sake, my brain moves in slow motion and my feet keep getting stuck on sticky words. I am watching my word count slowly climb (which is great), but the gap between what I write and the projected output to be successful in the NaNoWriMo competion continues to widen (not so great).

Then, after writing not-so-successfully, I open up my blog and wonder, does anyone actually read this? Does anyone really care about this journey I'm on? Even if they did, would they even know where to find me? I am perplexed. I write for the sake of writing, for putting pen to paper (figuratively) to satisfy my own impulses and inclinations. But, it would be nice to know that my blog exists out there, somewhere beyond my living room. But maybe that's not the point...maybe all a blog really is, is a process. A venue to vent, without constantly self-editing in fear. Writing for writing's sake, with the added bonus that someone might actually read it and care.

There is hope!

Today's Word Count: 7,190

Hallelujah!

I have my first follower! Thanks Lisa. Mom: you no longer have to worry about being my first follower and making me feel "uncool" or as if you were a helicopter mom...I think it's awesome you care! Now, I need to get on with writing my actual book, or I'll get nowhere and this will all have been for naught...

Location, Location, Location!

I just spent a wackload of time preparing my office as a comfortable writing space, hung pictures on the wall, tidied up the shelves... I finally emptied the plethora of boxes in my closet full of junk I'll never use but somehow accumulated: quarter-full jars of dried up acrylic paint inherited from my crafty grandmother, bits of paper I'll never scrap with but can't get rid of because they "remind me of when"...I put all this work into creating a comfortable, organized, calming and inspiring work space, and here I am sitting on the couch in my living room, in the middle of everything, and happy as a clam. I read once that Stephenie Meyer, author of the Twilight Series, sets herself right up in the middle of the action, and is perfectly content despite having her three boys running around her. Others, like John Wilson, a young adult fiction writer from Lantzville (whom I met with for advice at the beginning of my journey to becoming a writer), locks himself away in the upper floor of his guest cottage/garage, blinds shut, noise-free, and barely emerges till it's done. "Welcome back" is his wife's customary greeting after these month-long withdrawals from all but the written word. John's author friend in Ontario has no troubles waking at 5am and driving to some Torontonian suburb for a school visit. As his early departure saves him from the worst of the morning rush-hour traffic, he arrives early and plunks himself at the local Tim Horton's until it's time to migrate towards his eager young readers at the nearby school. I've tried Starbucks, personally, but unplugged always seem to take the seats with the outlets, which doesn't seem fair to those of us attached at the hip to a device requiring an electrical current.

So, location. There really is no perfect location for every person. It's as personal a choice as your preference for certain brand of chocolate bar or cut of underwear. The best place to write? Where you feel comfortable, where you can sit and go "ah" and just focus on the task at hand. For me? It's anywhere my loved ones are. Right now, my goofy lap-dog Doberman is sitting next to me on our extra-deep love seat, sharing my knit blanket, sawing logs as I click away on my keyboard. It's even better when my husband joins us, as he is now, reading his book or playing video games (as long as he remembers to wear his headphones). The best location for me is where I'm at ease.

Oh, by the way:

Today's word count: 6,615

(a dismal day...NaNoWriMo deficit now 9,000 words! But, progress nevertheless...)

The Beginning

It is my firm belief that if you can't imagine a dream coming true, it will more than likely never come true...perhaps because you don't believe in yourself or your dreams and abilities enough to MAKE it happen. I'm a dreamer - always have been, always will be. What have I got out of it? Well, I have a job that I'm not selfless or self-masochistic enough to enjoy...and I've somehow ended up living in the northern Canadian boon-dogs, where there's actually a roadkill sign-up list that entitles you, when your turn comes around, to scrape a moose carcass off the road and have a lovely meal of it (granted you retrieve it on time, before the weevils set in). I definitely did NOT dream THIS life up, but it has given me the encouragement I needed to buckle down and decide, if I could do anything, what I would want to do with my life?

I've made that decision, and now I'm pitting myself against writers from all around the world to prove that I can make it happen.

Yesterday, I joined NaNoWriMo, the National Novel Writing Month initiative designed to help writers like me get from zip to 50K in 30 days...That's about 1,600 words per day...which is a daunting feat! I started 6 days late, and have, so far, a 6,000 word deficit! But, I'm committed.

I'm switching routes. For years I've made decisions with that little part of my brain that says, take no risks, make money. But how often has that little part of my brain made me truly, incandescently happy? Drawing a blank...although I do thank it for my reletive comfort in recent years.

Now I'm making my decisions with my heart...writing feels good. It excites me, moves me, inspires me...there's no better time than now to make it happen, to make this dream come true!

I must remove myself from the stratosphere for now, however. I'm realizing it is nearly midnight, and an eager group of pubescent beings awaits my so-called sharp wit and wisdom come morning. I foresee the need for coffee...

Novel Word count: 6, 162.